Remember who you are

Growing up, there is one thing that I was told over and over again. Whenever my sisters or I would leave the house, my mother would tell us that she loved us, regardless of what recent teenage drama she was battling with us…

…and then she would tell us the most important thing: Remember who you are.

There have been many times since I left the house and started living on my own that I have heard my mom say this in my ear.

I am a “grown up” now, whatever that means, and my choices are mine to make, mine to regret and mine to complain about to the other sisters as they console me.

Whenever someone, male or female, challenges my beliefs, or the way that I was brought up, I start to think, “Am I wrong in my beliefs? Am I wrong in my opinion?”

In the family dynamic that is the Weather Vane, when your opinion is voiced, 100% of the time someone, or more than one of the sisters, will challenge you. I believe that this was and still is a major part of my up bringing. Whether it is fashion, the recent Ebola crisis, or religion (which is a favorite topic among the sisters, and for some reason we discuss this in VERY public places very loudly not because we make it that way, but because we are not afraid to let our opinions known, and we welcome outside thoughts), I never feel that my opinion does not matter, and if the conversation turns to an argument, which lets be honest does happen, then there is still a conversation.

We are four sisters with so many similarities and so many differences that it makes sense that we could and would argue about whether Katy Perry’s out fit at the VMAs was fantastic or horrible, or if the new health fad is just that – a fad or something that is substantial.  Whether it is philosophical or political, I respect my sisters’ opinions, and I hope they respect mine. One of my most favorite bloggers, Ken Breadner, posted something which really resonated with me:

“I respect your philosophy and political opinion, even when (especially when) it differs from mine (how else will I refine my views on things?) All I ask is the same respect in return.”

I respect other’s opinions, even if I do not share them, and I think that this is part of remembering who I am and learning and growing into the woman I am going to become, and Mom – I know who I am, thanks to you. I know that my opinion is respected within my family, Cody respects it and my close friends respect it.

I am not a prize writer, reporter, journalist, but I know that I look forward to voicing my opinion and hearing that of others, especially my sisters.

~ Jacqui

I could do better

I was always the last child, and of course I never felt like I ever measured up to any of my sisters. But this is not really about them, I just don’t feel like I measure up in general. I am constantly comparing myself to other people, their accomplishments and their lives.

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I need to stop! I am working at my life, I am growing up and finding my way!

I am trying so hard to please everyone else that I am literally driving myself insane. I don’t know when it became so important to me to please other people, and I don’t really care.
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I need to live for me. I need to live for my life.

People are sometimes very judgmental and very decided about how you should live, and the outcome of your life.
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I don’t think about other people’s lives like that. I think about if they are happy, I think about if they are good people to me and I think about how they treat others.

But here is the thing – the blame cannot and should not be placed on anyone else but myself. I let people’s judgements creep into my brain, I let their thoughts and feelings take me over, and then they become my own. I am to blame for this.

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As Mommy has always said to me, “You are very sensitive.” And it is true, I am. I am sensitive to other people’s feelings and thoughts, and I tend to neglect my own.

So I have made a decision.

Instead of going through life thinking that I could do, or have done better, I am going to do my best for me, for me and for Joe.

I am learning, so I know I will still sometimes slip and think about what other people want for my life before I think about what I want, but I am going to do better.

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I am me and I am odd, and I am just beginning.

~ Andreah