An ode to Jacqui

WE’RE BAAAAAAAAAAAACK!

It may not be Tuesday, but Julia and I decided to pull a switch-a-roo so I could have the honour of writing a post to mark this day of our very own Jacqui’s birth.

JQ, my baby duck, happiest of birthdays to you. I hope you have the best day possible today, regardless of responsibility and have to’s required of you today.

I’ve got to say, getting to be your big sister has been pretty kick ass so far, as I am sure it will continue to be. Getting to watch you grow over these past 26 years has been a wild, rewarding ride.

I mean, I got to know you from this point:

Her pants are SO inflated with fart.

Her pants are SO inflated with fart.

And watch you grow into this:

BAM! (she's still 12!)

BAM! (she’s still 12!) [Photo credit: Photography by Heather ]

I can’t believe you’re 26 though. I mean, it really does seem like yesterday that we were much shorter, standing in our country home, getting into whatever shenanigan we could to entertain ourselves…

I love that this picture exists

I love that this picture exists

And now we’re all grown up, trying to navigate all of life’s crazy adventures as they come…I hope it goes without saying, but I’m really grateful I’ve got you by my side through all of them.

I have loved watching you grow into your own person and become even more ‘you’ these past few years. You’ve inspired the hell out of me with your strength in your battle with epilepsy and conquering a shit ton of obstacles to celebrate two years seizure free this week. (Seriously, you KICK ASS)

Last year's one year anniversary tattoo

Last year’s one year anniversary tattoo

I admire your heart, your incredible wit and humor – I seriously still vote ‘stand up comedian’ needs to be added to your resume – and your need for peace making. You’re brave, smart and gorgeous from your heart out.

I hope 26 is incredible for you in every way – with more laughter, love and magic than you can hold. I know you’re already off to the best possible start.

Sisters ♥

Sisters ♥

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, dear Jacqui! We LOVE you!

~ Toni

The friends in your head

In my head and in everyone’s head, there is this fantasy at work where famous people you would only dream about meeting are actually your best friends. In my head, I have these people and they are the best imaginary best friends a girl could have.

I used to have a SEVERE crush on Daniel Radcliffe. I know, me? Like the guy who played Harry Potter? What?! But no seriously, he was my dream boy all through high school. I had a picture of him in my locker and a girl actually bit me because I tried to stop her from stealing my poster of D.R. Now he has grown up and is awkward and adorable in interviews, still taken aback by questions, and is still so funny and awesome. He would be my old high school crush best friend. You know, the one you realize should just be a best friend for a reason.

Oh Daniel.

Oh, Daniel

Next would be the pensive and incredibly bright friend. You know, the one that you could see drinking tea with at 2 o’clock in the morning just because you got on to a random topic and you know time will get away from you because “People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint – it’s more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly…time-y wimey…stuff.” That’s right. David Tennant is my best friend in my head. I know. I would actually love to meet him, because of just how awesome he is…in my head.

Everybody needs that one friend who spurs you forward and gets you into random adventures and things you would have never thought you would have gotten yourself into. Then they would be so into the adventures they often just walk off and leave you behind. If you have never seen the show Sherlock then you basically just got the rundown of what Sherlock Holmes is like in the show. But, much like Dr. Watson, I would still follow no matter what. This best friend is none other than Benedict Cumberbatch himself. He seems like he would be so smart, but weirdly endearing, and you would just have to forgive him or hate him completely.

Strangely weird, and weirdly strange Mr. Cumberbatch

Strangely weird, and weirdly strange Mr. Cumberbatch

And along with those random adventures, you need the friend that makes you laugh until you pee your pants, and possibly even pass out due to the hilarity. This lady is bizarre and awesome, and strange, and I would love to spent just and hour with her going grocery shopping or something, because I honestly believe that Rebel Wilson would be just that wonderful to hang out with…at least in my brain.

Seriously, Rebel Wilson is my spirit animal.

Seriously, Rebel Wilson is my spirit animal.

Then there is the snarky bestie who you hang out with and be surly and sarcastic with, but is still awkward and weird. Who you hang out with because life can suck and it’s nice to know that some people feel the same way. Also EVERYONE must have a certain level of sarcasm and sass in your life. Anna Kendrick would be the friend I would most likely want to go to the mall and quietly (or loudly) mock people with. At least, my imaginary Anna is like that.

I love her in these Movies!

I love her in the Pitch Perfect movies!

I would also need that elegant, but quirky friend, who makes me feel more adult, because even at 24 I often find myself looking around and wondering how to adult (and, yes, “adult” is now a verb). I would have Anne Hathaway as that friend. Imaginary Anne is completely lovely and quite often I find myself with her in an old book shop reading copies of Jane Austen books in the secluded quiet of a back corner.

She's just so PRETTY.

She’s just so PRETTY.

Those are my people; the people I will daydream about and imagine different scenarios with in everyday life.

Please, tell me – do you have imaginary people running around in your head? Tell me I am not alone!

~ Andreah

Monkey Muffins

Last week I was on vacation with Cody’s family, and man do I need a vacation from that vacation!

It was so relaxing, and I ate everything, and drank…everything.  Driving home on Sunday was hell because we were stuck in traffic for HOURS! And when we finally got home all I wanted to do was make a home cooked meal and hit the hay. After a much needed 12 hour sleep, I woke on Monday refreshed and antsy. I wanted to do something, I needed to do something.

It wasn’t that I didn’t have a to do list – like any one when they come back from vacation, with the unpacking, and the laundry and the mentally preparing for returning to work.  To be honest I was looking forward to getting back to our regular routine. In order to assist with getting back into the rhythm of things, I decided I was going to make muffins for my muffin (aww ?.. no? ew?) to have for breakfast for the next week. I took a traditional recipe and made it my own. They are peanut butter and banana muffins!

Ingredient list: 

2 Cups all purpose flour

1/2 cup lightly packed brown sugar

1 table spoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

3/4 cup of chunky peanut butter

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 eggs

3/4 cup milk

Before you start getting messy pre-heat the oven for 375 degrees F, then go over to your mixer and talk sweet to it. Let it know you are going to use it, but its going to like it. Whoa – did it just get a little spicy in here?

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Look at that bad ass bitch!

In a large bowl add all your dry ingredients starting with the 2 cups flour.

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Then the baking powder (note I used magic baking powder, you can only get this from going to your local witch or wizard, and trade them your magic beans for this! Don’t tell them I told you!)

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Then the brown sugar. I used dark brown sugar, because Julia bought it for me and it was in my pantry. Also she told me that it has better flavor than the light kind.. who knew? Now you do!

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And finally the salt! (for all those wondering, my nail polish colour is called pool party, I highly recommend this sassy splash of summer)

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Mix the dry ingredients together until blended, and combined. I didn’t take a picture of this because I am only one person, and give me a break. If you need a visual then you don’t belong in the kitchen!

Next add all your wet ingredients into your mixer bowl in order to prepare them to make a delicious baby with the dry ingredients!

First comes your chunky peanut butter. I used chunky because I like a little bit of a surprise when it comes to my PB&J, but please use smooth, regular or which ever kind you would like.

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mmmmm chunky!

Next comes the oil, vegetable oil. Nothing fancy.

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Dos eggs (dos means two, I learned this from my grade 10 Spanish class where I was named Eva – but according to  my niece, Dora is a great Espanol tutor)

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Add your milk. Fun fact: Cody is lactose in tolerant, so we never have milk in the house. We do however have cream, so I used 1/2 a cup of milk and then the rest of the required amount I used water. Which you could totally use cream for the whole amount if you are not worried about calories. (Also how about we agree on not telling him that I used milk in this recipe…K? K!)

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Then your ripe banana’s.  I got mine out of the freezer so they look especially delicious. Why did I get them out of the freezer you ask? Well because when I buy Banana’s I always buy enough that some will go ripe, and then I freeze them so when Cody or I have a craving for Banana bread I can bust out these bad boys and be a freaking super hero!

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Once all your wet ingredients are combined, then slowly add your dry! I did get a picture of this, because I became a photographer for a moment, and then pulled a muscle, and cut that shit out!

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Once everything is combined, add your liners to your muffin/cupcake pan. I like to tell my muffin mixture it is about to get thrust into adulthood so its not a surprise when they are put into the fiery inferno that is your oven, but hey – to each their own! Just don’t blame me when your muffins are all dry and not delicious because you decided not to give them a little warning.

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Pay no attention to the messy oven…

Now set your timer for 25 mins and relax… I like to crochet or annoy my dog with my love and affection. Or you could clean up the mess you made, but cleaning is for chumps!

After your lovely timer rings and sings the songs of peanut butter choir – run, don’t walk to your oven. GET AN OVEN MIT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD and take out your Monkey Muffins!

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….. 

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Now… the secret to ANY good muffin is…Nutella! Mmmmmmm and enjoy!

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~ Jacqui

Instructions:

In a large bow, mix together the flour, brown sugar, baking power and salt.

In a separate bowl beat together the peanut butter, oil, eggs, milk and bananas.

Combine the wet ingredients with the dry ingredients until just moistened.

spoon the batter into 12 large muffin tins. Bake for 20-25 mins, use a tooth pic in order to confirm that they are cooked all the way through.

The adventures of Hendrix and Bacon – Part 1

Hendrix is our 8-year old Yorkie Terrier who was given to me by my future mother-in-law, and Bacon is our 5-year old English Bulldog who was a birthday present for Cody. We brought Bacon home when Hendrix was three years old and his world was turned upside down – not only was he no longer an only dog, but the little brother we brought home was not so little.

Cody and I have always thought that Hendrix had some kind vendetta against Bacon, but we had no real proof. Until one fateful day during a midday nap when I caught Hendrix in the act of sabotage!

I had come home from work (this particular day I was only scheduled to work until 12:30 p.m.), I made myself a delicious sandwich with pickles. This sandwich was quite filling. As I finished the first half my eyes got heavy. I curled up in the corner of our sectional, pulled the blankets up and settled in for an afternoon nap – the kind of nap you dream about while sitting at your desk around 3 p.m….yeah, that kind of nap. My eyes started to shut when I heard the familiar clicking of nails on the floor.

Through the slits of my eyes, I watched as Hendrix jumped up on the coffee table.

He thought I was sleeping…

He cautiously maneuvered around the spare change and my earrings that I took off before I retreated to plush oasis, and made his way towards the plate with the remains of my lunch.

I have decided at this point to watch him – I know that if Cody were to walk in, Hendrix would quickly retreat under our bed, hiding until his indiscretion had been forgotten.

Hendrix quietly grabbed the leftover sandwich and proceeded to place it on the corner of the coffee table. Then, he licked his lips and waited. Waited for his victim to come and see what he is doing. Curiosity will be the demise of Bacon.

As Bacon came around the corner, he immediately spotted the sandwich within his reach and trotted over to it. With one swift move, Bacon’s clumsy head is on the coffee table as his mouth grabs towards the delicious treat, knocking around the plate. Hendrix sat back, watching Bacon as eats it and looking over to see if I have woken up from the clanging of the plate. I did not move for fear of ruining the amazing events that were unfolding in front of me! Hendrix’s plan had been foiled! Drat!

As Bacon licked his lips in pleasure, Hendrix was already devising another plan to inevitably bring down Bacon.

Pinky and the Brain

~ Jacqui

A very merry unbirthday to you! TO YOU!

“Babe..?”

“Yes?”

“I’m 25…right?”

“Are you actually asking me this?”

“Yes – how old am I?”

“You are 26!”

“I lost a whole year…..?”

This is an actual conversation Cody and I had about three weeks ago.

It seems that as you get older for women, you start going backwards in age, but for men you just lose years. You stop counting all together.

Today Cody turns 27! I am marrying this handsome devil.

And although he is not a big fan of birthdays,(tonight’s festivities include Chinese food and a Sons Of Anarchy marathon), I am a huge fan of him!

Love you Cody! Happy birthday! I have a feeling this is going to be a great year!

~ Jacqui

I was LIED to!

I have a bone to pick with Walt Disney – he has set me up for failure! Ever since I was a young girl he has spewed lies and set unrealistic goals for my life. Well, Walt, I have had it up to the top of the tower in my non-existent castle!

First there was Cinderella, who taught me that when I get older and am too busy to plan my outfit for a night out, there’s not a fret! The mice and birds who live in my attic and sub-basement will be happy to whip something up. I can spend more time at work and cleaning my house now because of all the free time I will have not having to make my own clothes!

My reality? I live in an older house, and am no stranger to mice. I do not live in a land far far away. I live in the real world where mice eat through your electrical wires, shit everywhere and are a general nuisance. There are entire sections in hardware stores dedicated to the riddance of these creatures. Cinderella would be mortified! Not once have I come home to a mouse-made couture dress delicately created with the knick knacks and rags around my house. Instead I come home from work after a long day and where are my clothes? On the ground where I left them. Now I have to struggle to figure out the perfect outfit for the ball.

Then, there is Snow White, who lived with 7 men and made it look like heaven, a party with music and dancing every night, and yes she cleaned the house, but before she came along they were getting by just fine. Now I know not all men are grody, but in my experience I would never want to live with 7 of them, dwarfs or not!  Could you imagine the smell? The grocery bill? THE ARGUMENT OVER THE TV REMOTE?  I am shuddering just thinking about it!  Snow White, either you are a goddess who has managed to tame 7 men, or you are one sweep away from a nervous breakdown! Either way, you did not prepare me properly to live with ONE boy by myself let alone 7. (I love you Cody.)

Rapunzel and Ariel may have told me the biggest lie…about MY HAIR! Let’s start with Rapunzel who let her hair grow out to unimaginable lengths, with no product, no trims, just au natural! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!? Apparently, in this land far far away, there is no such thing as humidity or split ends or GREY HAIR! I get up an hour earlier than I technically have to just to make sure my hair is tamed enough that when I walk into work I am not asked to put a bag over my head. Straighteners, products, curling irons, hair spray – nothing? Really Rapunzel? You are really going to tell me that you sat up in that tower of yours and just let it grow and grow?  Her poor neck is all I can keep thinking! Every time I watch that movie with my nieces and nephew, my mind races: She had to have at least a chiropractor on call? How is she not a hunchback?

AND then there is Ariel! With her graceful rise from the water during her big musical number. For years girls around the world have been immersing their heads in water and trying to find the perfect flip technique. If you are sitting here reading this, pretending like you have never done this before you are LYING to yourself. This past summer I spent a good 20 minutes attempting to get the perfect flip, each time suffocating myself with my soaking strands of hair. Finally, after one flip too many, my neck advised me quickly that I am not suited for the hair-flipping life. I have since then removed Beyoncé from dream jobs. I have learned my lesson…the hard way.

Yeah, right.

I live my life every day knowing that I met Cody the good old fashion way. That he didn’t come into my tower and kiss me as fate brought our lives together. I have to work to get my hair the way I want it. Small critters will not make me a new wardrobe, and frankly my singing voice does not entice birds to join in with me; instead, I am sure, it scares them as it scares my two dogs.

I may have been fooled, but you have a chance to spread the word so that other little girls don’t grow up with high expectations like I did. It’s been a tough road, but I am doing just fine taking it one day at a time.

~ Jacqui

You can go home again…

Well, I am, as you know back at home, living with the Mom again.

I don’t really have any tips to living with the parents, except to just remember that this is all just temporary.

I was going to do a funny post with tips about living with the parents again, but I don’t have any funny things to say about living with the parents again, because quite frankly, it’s not funny, and it kind of sucks.

But I do just want to make this post because it sucks, and I wanted to say it out loud.

I wish we didn’t fall down. I wish we could have stayed in Peterborough. And I really wish that we wouldn’t have had to move back to Mom and Mike’s.

It sucks that we have had to shove all our stuff from an apartment into random nooks and crannies. It also kind of sucks that our bedroom is literally just a bed.

I feel like we are in the way, but I know our Momma loves us and supports us, and we are so lucky she is here for us.

So this post is to just say, it sucks, but we have the best mom in the world, and the coolest stepdad.

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Thank you, guys! You both are awesome

~ Andreah

Got questions?

How many consecutive questions do you think you could come up with for the Sisterhood? We’re taking your questions in the comments, on our Facebook page, via email, carrier pigeon or smoke signal and we’ll answer them next week! Ask anything, ask everything, but don’t forget to take a breath every now and then.

 

~ Weather Vane Sisterhood

Here’s the short of it

Dear Readers,

I am going to share something with you, our lovely followers, that not a lot of you know, and I hope that most of you will continue to follow us and read us after I share it with you…because it’s a big one! A doozy. It’s HUGE!

I am short! Legally, by definition, I am short. The average height of women in Canada is 5’3.4″ and since I am below average, I am short. In my family I am not the only one – Julia and I share our special bond by being lower on the totem pole, if you will. Who is taller you may ask? Well, due to a pact I made some years ago, Julia is much taller than myself.

Please do not cry for me, do not fret, for I am a survivor and I can survive this. Let me tell you why I can survive this – it’s because I do not care!

For example, my nephew Joey, God love him, enjoys pointing out my vertical deficiency every time I see him, always reminding me that he is still growing and I am not, and one day he will be as tall or taller than me. Thanks buddy. If it wasn’t for you, then I would be lost in a sea of lies, still holding onto a glimmer of hope that some day, when I grow up, I will be taller.

For those of you who share my “less than average” stature, let me tell you how I managed to cope (we can do this together!).

I started to look at the world in a better light when I thought of all the things that were to my advantage by being petite.

Bath tubs – How many tall people can enjoy a bath with all their limbs settled below the water in a COMFORTABLE manner? Not a whole lot. No matter where I live, or go, I can sleep a little better knowing that if a bath tub is available, then a bath is always possible! Tell me my long-legged friends – is this possible for you?

Heels – Whenever Cody and I go anywhere, date nights, weddings, parties, what EVER it may be, I will always have the option to wear the most ridiculous heels in the world if I want to. Because I am short, I will never be taller than my love, and he will never feel shorter than me!

Clearance – Although I have not been on a plane in my lifetime, the one common complaint that I know of is the lack of leg room. Since I am of the below-average type, I will never have this issue. I will forever be able stretch my gams. Oh the luxury! Also in the same category of clearance, I have never had to slouch to be in a room – there’s no hunch back here!

Forever young – There are no special creams, regimes, pills, or tricks up my sleeve for my youthful appearance, oh no! At least not for now. At my ripe young age of 24, I am constantly asked to verify my age when I purchase beverages of the adult kind, or even when I buy tickets to an 18A movie. As much as I would love to blame it on my youthful good looks, I will have to give credit it to my child-like height.

Although it may seem that my list is quite…short, I assure you that I am completely aware of my “limitation” and do not find it something to be ashamed of – I am short and I am proud of it!

So please friends, next time you find yourself beside someone of the petite stature, and that incredible urge starts to bubble up from within, try your hardest to refrain from advising me of my situation, please keep in mind that I am more than aware, and I am loving every inch of it!

short

~ Jacqui